Guilt-Tripping You So Mom Doesn’t Have To

Order this on Thursday if you want to get it to your mom by Mother’s Day. Order later if you’re a selfish ingrate who doesn’t appreciate everything that poor woman did for you.

Let’s face it: you can never really repay your Mom. From squeezing you out at birth, to cheering you up when you cried, to tucking you in at night, the debt is simply too great. Mother’s Day isn’t so much about trying to even out the balance sheet as it is about acknowledging that it can never be evened out. And what better way to say it than with an estate-grown, limited-edition Chardonnay?

In our experience, almost all moms like Chardonnay. We wonder if it’s a hormonal thing that kicks in along with the milk production. And this isn’t just any limited-edition, estate-grown Chardonnay. This is the St. Francis 2006 Reserve Chardonnay, Behler Vineyard, Sonoma County. Let’s unpack that long, unwieldy name so we know exactly what Mom’s getting this year, shall we?

St. Francis Winery is celebrating its 30th year of turning hand-picked Sonoma County grapes into coveted premium wines. 2006, of course, is the year these grapes were grown and harvested. Reserve tells you this wine was only produced in limited quantities and is only available directly from St. Francis. Behler Vineyard is the original St. Francis estate vineyard, first planted in 1971, in storied Sonoma County. And that leaves…

Chardonnay. And oh, what a Chardonnay. This one starts with Behler’s volcanic soils and hand-picked grapes, and ends with fragrances of tropical and exotic fruits and a palate of concentrated fruit flavors. A rich, buttery texture and concentrated mouthfeel are almost enough to convince your Mom to forgive you for not calling often enough. Almost.

Like we said above, Mother’s Day is all about the gesture that says “I can’t thank you enough.” But the best gestures are more than gestures. This St. Francis 2006 Reserve Chardonnay three-pack proves that when you give a thoughtful gift, it’s more than the thought that counts.

2006 Chardonnay:

• Harvest: September 2006
• Aging: Nine Months
• Storage: French Oak
• Bottling: August 2007
• Alcohol: 14.5% by volume
• Aging Potential: 3 to 5 years

Rules and restrictions:

• Wine sold by winery (or a retailer in your state where necessary)
• You must be 21 or older to order
• Whoever receives the package must be 21 or older
• If you're drunk when the package shows up, you will not be allowed to receive it
• Wine cannot be delivered to a P.O. Box
• We highly recommend you use a business address as your shipping address

Thanks to stick-in-the-mud buzzkilling state legislators, wine may only be delivered to the following states:

• California
• Colorado
• Connecticut
• Florida
• Georgia
• Idaho
• Illinois
• Iowa
• Louisiana
• Michigan
• Minnesota
• Missouri
• Nebraska
• Nevada
• New Hampshire
• New Mexico
• New York
• North Carolina
• North Dakota
• Oregon
• South Carolina
• Texas
• Vermont
• Virginia
• Washington
• West Virginia
• Wisconsin
• Wyoming

If your state's not on the list, you're out of luck... for now. Keep up with the ever-changing laws over at ShipCompliantBlog.com, and/or sound the alarms with your state assembly person through FreeTheGrapes.org. Meanwhile, all Federal, state and local laws are complied with in providing this wine.